Well hi blog!! I’m back…
And did I really go anywhere? I mean, if you are a homie who has been going to shows or you are still putting up with my memes on Instagram, then I am still right on schedule with annoying the heck outta ya! Muahaha.
But for realsies, a serious conversation I had myself before starting this revolved around one thing: consistency. Honestly, it scared the living hell out of me… AS IT SHOULD HAVE!!
Was I gonna stay on track with posting? Was I gonna run out of ideas? Was I gonna get lazy? Was my life gonna get turned over on its head?
These were just a few of the fears that definitely kept rattling around that lil noggin’ of mine…
And hilariously enough, THEY ALL ENDED UP HAPPENING! AHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Hahaha, I am not joking. Since my last post on here, I have had all sorts of crazy life changes that I cannot help but chuckle about. You know, like being on your favorite rollercoaster as the world is ending type beat… “I paid to get on this ride, I might as well enjoy it!!”
*don’t worry, I promise that I am not going crazy… yet.*
But yeah. Lots of moving pieces these past few weeks and I still can’t put my finger on whether this transitional period was a good or bad time of my life… Like in the moment, it was absolutely dreadful. But I also kinda understand just how important it has all been for me. It was the end of a chapter of my life that needed to end. In movies or in the books, we usually see our hero living in a lame and broken life. No way out… Nowhere to go… and honestly, they aren’t even trying to leave that life. They are basically immune to it. Putting up with it until they die.
But Then…
Some mysterious conflict occurs, and they are thrown into a wild and adventurous journey! Filled with lessons from eccentric people in new and exotic places that ultimately guide them straight to the promised land of the denouement!!! hmmm… now that sounds like something I would read.
However, life in this realm doesn’t cut to commercial in between the action. BUT the lessons are still there, my friends. It just isn’t as glamorous, and that’s okay.
It’s just like… the older I get, the more I fear failure… obviously… but I’ve also just been really trying to embrace failure. No, I don’t mean that I just love failing! But in every failure, lies a learning lesson that carry some significant insight. Look back into your own failures, was there something that made you think, “Oh wow, I should probably NOT do that thing again”? Most likely there always is… and I just freakin’ love that. How the heck are you gonna grow without those curveballs, champ?!
Note: this stuff is 110% easier said than done, and I will be the first to admit that. I am still and always lowkey beating myself up about not posting on here with new music updates, funny stories… among the plenty of other things I haven’t been on the ball with in my life.
And why?!?! It’s not like anyone whatsoever has said anything negative to me about it or kicking my ass at in the schoolyard. I dunno, giving myself a break is something I kinda suck at, and that sucks… But hey! We out here working on it! 😌
With all that being said, things have truly been coming together in a way I didn’t see possible in the slightest just a month ago… I’m stoked, homies. I left a job that wasn’t serving my soul whatsoever and was welcomed into my absolute dream job, I moved into a new apartment (IT HAS A KITCHEN AND I ALREADY BOUGHT A BUNCH OF PLANTS), and I have just been diving deeper in this silly little thing called life… And it’s been a blessing.
Not to say that I still don’t have some bad days, but in this moment: I am stoked, friends. Just really really reaaaaaallllyy trying to learn how to actually live my life in the best way possible; a common theme I run into every now and again. Whether it’s clicking on that random recommended video on YouTube, finding a new recipe to cook, getting responsibly slammed on a new cocktail at that dive bar I keep driving past… Those kinda things.
Just trying to find some peace of mind and get rid of some anxiety and trauma that has subtlety made its way into my brain in recent months… and just locking down the fundamentals. I hope to start writing about it all soon enough!
But hey… Blah Blah Blah: I’m just preaching again. Who really cares? I’m just spitballin’… per usual. 😏
Salud, my friends. Go drink a marg, have fun, laugh with new and old friends alike, write a joke, write an epic, listen to some city pop or Katy Perry… just go live it up, buddy!
I will see y’all soon enough! Go check the Google Drive to check out what I have been up to in the meantime.
Peace and Love, Forever and Always.
-B
#AlwaysHappyHour